“Undefeated Champ!” By Chris Zito

Marriage is all about consistency. The most consistent thing in my marriage is that my wife wins every argument.

I presume this is how my wife will look after reading this.

Any married person seeing that score can hardly be surprised. And this is by no means a concession that Kimi is always right. There’s a difference between being right and winning an argument. Here’s a little secret about men, ladies. We know you have the power. In most marriages it’s not one man (or woman) one vote. Women get two votes, men get one.

Yes, as some suspected, it was a diabolical scheme for world domination!

Let’s not pretend. We’re all grown ups here. Women have something every heterosexual man wants. When we meet a woman we woo her into it handing over. It’s no secret. Wooing doesn’t happen unless the woman wants it to. The thing is, women are sometimes under the impression that after years of marriage the wooing stops. It doesn’t.
Some may ask, “Chris, are you saying that when a man brings home his paycheck and helps with the kids and the house, he’s not just doing the right thing, he’s still also just trying to get some?”

Yes. That’s what I’m saying.

So there are very few, if any, arguments where a man will stubbornly not back down. They are usually negotiated early in the relationship. While we were dating, I explained to Kimi that I like to watch the Red Sox. If they are in the pennant race I like to watch every game. If they are in the playoffs I will every pitch. She agreed. It’s not in writing but she’s stood by the deal ever since. Pretty much everything else, ball’s in her court…so to speak.

Yay! Zito’s watching!

True, I’ve been able to slip in a good deal of football watching over the years, but if we ever argued about it? Good bye Patriots. I like football but it doesn’t keep me warm at night. Not like the Red Sox…er, I mean Kimi.

Thanks for reading. Tell your pals.
Chris Zito


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