“Abandoned? Hardly.” by Chris Zito

There’s a simple reason for the “helicopter parent” phenomenon. Parents today  are convinced that if they don’t spend every possible moment with their kids they’ll grow up to spend years and a small fortune dealing with abandonment issues. They’re mistaken.

Daddy’s here. Daddy’s here. Daddy’s here. Daddy’s…

So many guys my age lament that “my dad was never around,” which is understandable when you’re 8 of 9 years old. By the time you’re in your 30s you should have figured out that Dad wasn’t avoiding you, he was working.  He was making sure you didn’t starve or freeze to death. This is a basic fathering duty that most men with kids feel in their bones. Provide. Food and shelter. Not entertainment.

This guy’s kids never feel abandoned. They also live in their car.

My Dad wasn’t a  little league coach. He wasn’t a member of the PTA. He didn’t carpool. He was at work. There were five kids, a mortgage, and a stay at home wife. I’ve mentioned his schedule in this space before. Six days a week. Twelve hour days. He wasn’t at work all that time because it was his calling, or his favorite activity.  He had obligations which he took seriously. You know what he never took seriously? Me, when I bitched that he didn’t spend enough time at home.  And he didn’t try to explain it to me. He was too busy. He gave me enough credit to assume I’d figure it out once I grew up.

Why does Dad go back out after supper most nights?
Maybe so we can
have supper every night.

Let’s give our kids a little credit. We do want we can when can. If we miss the occasional open house at school or swim meet, the kids will survive. And they’ll forgive us when they grow up and it’s their turn to wish they could make a living going to little league games and dance recitals.

Thanks for reading. Tell your pals.
Chris Zito


3 Responses

  1. FanTAStic. I am printing this one out for the scrapbook!!

  2. Fathers have been away for centuries: as soldiers, merchants, jobbers, etc, etc – It is only recently, that the idea of “Daddy” has become politically correct with the intent of infusing us with guilt- I loved my father and honor him daily with my prayers – But the last thing on God’s earth I wanted when I was a kid was him knowing what I was up and the last on earth I’m sure he wanted was to know what I was up to – Two rules: Home when the bell rang and don’t use the 22 rifle – that’s it – Oh, and stay away from the lathe, the table saw and the older part of the barn, cause the floorboard were falling. – Thank God for my dad – This is all the fault of Oprah

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